chapter 4

The entire time we've spent at Vance's has been filled with love, laughter and wonderful times; I've also made the decision to move us out here in the beginning of June, thus giving me time to find a new job and home along with quitting my current job and selling the house. Surprisingly Victor and Sonya have decided to move to San Francisco to be closer to Vance.

Christmas morning around 6 a.m. Tyler woke me up by jumping on my stomach and saying rather loudly; "Papa,, Santa came!"

Cracking an eye open to see my oldest son smiling widely at me as he stares at me; waiting for me to get up so we can open presents with everyone. Three days ago, Tyler and I went Christmas shopping for the family and Tristan, while my youngest baby stayed with the family; I had bought my boys' gifts from me and Santa o****e and sent to Vance's house. Vance and I wrapped the gifts the second night we were here and hid them in the hall closet.

"I'm upbabyboy but before we open presents, we need to use the bathroom and I need to change Tristan's dirty diaper."

Ty pouts for a second before smiling again; "Okay papa, let's go then!"

Since Tristan is still sleeping, though I'm not sure how since we're not being quiet, Ty and I use the toilet and wash our hands before reentering the bedroom to find Tristan starting to wake up. Going over to the crib, where I gently pick him up, while cooing; "I love you Tristan and Tyler too."

"Ove pa, ove T!" Tristan responds; instantly causing me to burst into tears since he is never said 'love' or Tyler's name before now.

"Love Tristan," Tyler responds excitedly as I smother both of my boys' faces with kisses; earning loud giggles from them both.

"What's going on in here?" Carson asks entering the bedroom with a curious smile.

"Tristan said his version of 'love' and Tyler's name just now," I sob.

"Love you Tyler and Tristan," I tell my boys, hoping Tristan does it again.

"Ove pa; ove T!" Tristan giggles out on a shriek.

Carson's jaw drops in a happy-shock before praising Tristan; who smiles toothily at his uncle while I change his diaper. Straightening with Tristan in my arms, Carson instantly takes him from me with a smirk before walking out of the room with him and Ty.

"Everyone else is up and meeting in the living room," he calls back over his shoulder; as I throw away the dirty diaper and washing my hands.

Entering the living room, I'm struck by the sudden overwhelming urge to cry and that I'm intruding on a very intimate family moment that I'm not a part of; and that at least I shouldn't be a part of. Hanging back despite the urge and desire to be with my boys on this holiday but I don't want to ruin this moment.

"Hey are you alright?" Victor asks; noticing me standing a few feet from the living room.

"Yeah, just taking in the view," I quickly respond with the best smile I can manage.

"Then join us," Sonya demands lightly; despite how long I've been in this family, I still feel like she doesn't like me being around.

Quickly joining the boys on the floor near the tree, trying to keep the tears at bay; I've forgotten to take my medicine the last two days and I'm seriously thinking of moving earlier than I planned; putting a little distance between Sonya and me for a while and see if distance will improve our relationship.

"Mom, please; you're not being very nice to Liam and all he has ever done is be nice to you and want you to like him," Steven snaps.

"Steven, it's okay," I murmur; not wanting to them to fight because of me, especially today.

All the adult eyes land on me as I hand Tyler and Tristan a present each; to stare at me as Steven says; "No it isn't; mom needs to get over whatever her issue is with you."

"I don't like him because if it wasn't for him, my baby would still be alive," Sonya snaps.

Sniffling as a couple of tears fall; "Sooner rather than later, you won't have to be around me since we're moving here quicker than I originally planned. I'll arrange for daycare so you don't have to see me or the boys after this week. Actually, the boys and I will either head home early or stay at a hotel the rest of the time we're here."

The room falls silent after my small rant besides the sounds from the boys as they open their gifts. Honestly, I can't blame any of them for their silence; I'm sure the only reason they've tolerated me this long is due to my boys and their connection to Luke. Once the boys have finished opening their presents, I quietly slip from the room as the others open their gifts so I can pack our belongings to head to a hotel for the night; before driving home first thin in the morning to take care of things when arrive home, such as searching for a job, a home, placing my home on the market and daycare. As I zip the last bag shut, there's a knock on the  door as it opens with Vance, Carson and Steven entering, all three with deep frowns on their lips.

"Oh hell no, you and the boys are not leaving; don't let our mom make you feel bad about yourself," Vance starts off as the three of them stand in front of me.

"It's fine, I honestly understand her hatred toward me; it's nothing I haven't felt about myself or from others. You guys can feel the same way toward me as well; I won't be angry."

"Damnit all Liam, that isn't how we feel at all about you," Steven sighs exasperated while pinching the bridge of his nose.

  "This is my life and I'm slowly coming to terms with it and it is fine. I understand that if I hadn't agreed to our friends coming over that night; Luke would still be alive."

Grabbing the bags I walk around them to head downstairs to fetch the boys and their new toys so we can leave without too much fuss; "Come on boys, we're going to stay at a hotel tonight; doesn't that sound like fun?"

"Why can't we stay here?" Tyler whines as he follows me as I carry Tristan toward the door.

"We're going to have an adventure tonight," I say with false cheerfulness; trying to make this fun for him.

"Okay papa," he agrees with a smile as I open the door.

Turning to the Carmichael's with a sad smile; "Once the three of us are settled wherever we move too, I'll be changing their last names to mine and cutting all ties to your family; so you don't have to be associated with us any longer."

Looking back down at Tyler as I open the door for us to leave the house with a guilty sigh before saying the others; "Thanks for everything and Merry Christmas."

"Liam, please don't leave, we want and need all three of you in our lives," Carson begs with a tear-filled voice.

"Tyler say goodbye to your uncles," I murmur trying not to cry.

"Bye uncle Van, uncle Car and uncle Steven," he says with a wave and a smile.

"Bye Tyler, bye Tristan; we love you," Vance says for the three of them.

Exiting the home, I shut the door softly behind us, afraid that I'm shutting another door on yet another family; who is bothered by me and my presence. Once I have the boys strapped in their car seats and I'm sitting in my seat and buckled, I instantly start sobbing; quietly since I don't want Tyler or Tristan to hear me.

Placing the car in drive after starting the engine, I pull away from Vance's home towards the nearest motel after searching and using my GPS; hoping there is an available room for the evening and once in the parking lot, I call since I don't want to bring both boys inside with me if there isn't an available room. Hanging up the phone once the call is completed, not sure what to do at the moment since there is no room and I don't want to start the drive home because I'm upset.

Picking my phone up, I call the one person who despite not wanting to see them all again, will answer and help me in some way and the man answers the phone on the third ring with a cheerful; "Merry Christmas, Liam!"

This causes me to burst into a fresh round of tears as I mange to speak; "Can you help me, I don't know what to do and I'm scared?"

"Where are you and the boys?" he instantly answers and I can hear him moving around at wherever he is at.

"I'm at the Motel 8 in Los Angeles; we're sitting inside my Jeep," I manage between hiccups.

"Alright, I'm in L.A. as well, visiting my family; I'll be there in thirty minutes, if not sooner; just sit tight," he assures. "Stay in your Jeep and on the phone with me since I'm not driving, until I get there; okay, love?"

"Okay; why do people I love leave me?" I whisper brokenly; I know I walked away from Vance and his two brothers but I had too.

"If they leave you on their own and with nothing bad happening to them, then they are dumb, baby."

"I can't take another person walking out of my life and my kids' lives," I sob as I watch my boys drift off to sleep; since they were up earlier than normal.

"You don't have to worry about me leaving you or the boys; ever," he promises sweetly.

"Please don't make promises you can't keep," I tearfully whimper as the boys drop off to sleep.

"This isn't an empty promise, Liam; I'm going tobe stuck to you like glue until you tell me to take a hike."

Lightly giggling through the tears at him, which I think is exactly what he was trying to do; "Thank you, Axel."

"Anytime baby, anytime," he sincerely responds. "I'm about twenty minutes away, where are you parked in the parking lot?" 

"Near the entrance; I'm in a blue Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo."

"Okay, good; what did the boys get for Christmas?"

For the next twenty minutes we talk about a variety of topics and every time a vehicle pulls in, I'm checking to see if it is Axel; until a black Dodge Ram pickup truck slowly pulls in with two men inside the cab and the passenger is Axel. When we make eye contact, he smiles brightly at me as the guy driving parks the truck next to the Jeep; Axel is out quickly of the truck, throwing open my door and pulling me into his arms; tightly holding me to his hard muscled body that is yet surprisingly comfortable.

"Thank you for coming; I don't know what to do right now," I mumble into his chest as I fight off another round of tears.

"Never a problem," he murmurs into before turning to the guy in the truck; "Thanks, Tommy; I'll call you soon."

Tommy nods before driving away with a wave to the two of us after Axel shut the passenger side door as I whimper quietly to him; "I'm sorry I ruined you Christmas."

"You didn't ruin anything baby, I'm Jewish and I don't celebrate Christmas; instead I celebrate Hanukkah."

Axel moves slightly so I look up at him to see him checking on the boys before returning his gaze to me; "Now tell me what's going on?"

So, I explain everything to him, finishing off by asking him; "Do you think I over reacted to this situation?"

"Partially; I can understand being upset by her reaction and words toward you but if I was you, I wouldn't cut Luke's brothers from your lives. They love you and the boys and I know that the three of you love them, too."

"You're right, thank you," I murmur starring up at him in awe of the simply insightfully brilliant man in front of me.

"So, here is what we are going to do; I'm going to drive us back to my house in San Diego in your Jeep and you are going to stay there with me until you're ready to go home. Once we're at my house, you're going to call Vance and let them know the three of you are fine and that you want them and not their mum in you're lives; alright baby?"

That's exactly what I do when we arrive at his home a couple of hours later and everything is better between the Carmichael brothers and me and they understand that I don't want their mom around the boys or me. My boys are excited to play in Axel's fenced in backyard with their toys they got for Christmas.

"Papa, we see uncles again?" Tyler asks as we have lunch.

"Yes baby, we will," I promise him since this is the truth; leaving out though that at the moment they won't be seeing their granma.

"Papa, who he?" Ty asks even though we've been with Axel for some time now.

"He's my friend, Axel," I respond smirking at Axel; letting him know that he's more than my 'friend' but Tyler wouldn't understand that.

Ty shrugs at me as he returns to play with his toys and his brother; when Tristan decides to call over to Axel and I with a teething ring hanging from his mouth. Giggling at him as he crawls into my lap with a huge smile around the teething ring at me once he's sitting on my lap comfortably.

"Hey baby boy," I say to him; kissing the top of his head.

Tristan pulls the teething ring from his mouth, shouting; "Pa!" Smiling as I kiss the top of his head again, while Tristan turns his attention to Axel; babbling at him and I can't help but laugh hard at Axel's rapt attention at Tristan.

Once Tristan stops babbling, Axel responds with an enthusiastic; "Well is that so; sounds very interesting!"

Tristan giggles at him while stretching his arms out toward Axel, who snaps his head to me, silently asking if he can hold my son; which I nod too, so he reaches over to carefully take Tristan from me and cuddles him close to his hard chest. A sight that instantly melts my heart, so I snap a few pics of the two of them together and a few of Ty as well.

"Hand me your phone and have Tyler sit with us, please?" Axel asks holding a hand out; while holding Tristan securely to him with his other arm.

"Ty, come here for a second, please?" I ask him, handing my iphone 8 over to Axel; curiously as Tyler joins us with the action figure he's been playing with and sits on my lap as Axel moves himself and Tris closer to me, our sides "Papa, who he?" Ty asks even though we've been with Axel for some time now.

"He's my friend, Axel," I respond smirking at Axel; letting him know that he's more than my 'friend' but Tyler wouldn't understand that.

Ty shrugs at me as he returns to play with his toys and his brother; when Tristan decides to call over to Axel and I with a teething ring hanging from his mouth. Giggling at him as he crawls into my lap with a huge smile around the teething ring at me once he's sitting on my lap comfortably.

"Hey baby boy," I say to him; kissing the top of his head.

Tristan pulls the teething ring from his mouth, shouting; "Pa!" Smiling as I kiss the top of his head again, while Tristan turns his attention to Axel; babbling at him and I can't help but laugh hard at Axel's rapt attention at Tristan.

Once Tristan stops babbling, Axel responds with an enthusiastic; "Well is that so; sounds very interesting!"

Tristan giggles at him while stretching his arms out toward Axel, who snaps his head to me, silently asking if he can hold my son; which I nod too, so he reaches over to carefully take Tristan from me and cuddles him close to his hard chest. A sight that instantly melts my heart, so I snap a few pics of the two of them together and a few of Ty as well.

"Hand me your phone and have Tyler sit with us, please?" Axel asks holding a hand out; while holding Tristan securely to him with his other arm.

"Ty, come here for a second, please?" I ask him, handing my iphone 8 over to Axel; curiously as Tyler joins us with the action figure he's been playing with and sits on my lap as Axel moves himself and Tris closer to me, our sides

touching.

"Smile," Axel says holding my phone up with a wide smile and my camera on selfie mode.

"Cheese!" Tyler and I say together with our own wide smiles as Axel takes a few pics.

"Funny faces now," Axel chuckles before the three of us make funny faces as he clicks more pictures off. "Perfect, here you go, love," he says handing my phone back to me.

Tyler climbs off my lap to continue playing on the grass as Tristan lies his head on Axel's chest, closing his eyes and falling asleep in his hold. I'm thankful that Tristan and Tyler seem comfortable with Axel; which will make our dating a little easier, I think.

Vance's P.O.V.

Hanging up the phone with Liam, I walk back into the living room to face my family; my brothers and dad look upset like myself while mom looks rather pleased with her behavior toward Liam.

Losing my tempter at my mom as I snap at her; "You do realize if Luke was still here; he would be pissed at you for what you just did; you know that right?"

Her cocky, smug smile never falters, so I continue; "Oh, by the way, you're not allowed to see the boys ever again; he's placing them in daycare while he still lives in Salem. Once they move here, Liam said we can see the boys whenever we want."

I can't help the smirk that takes over my lips at her fallen expression; "But they're my grandchildren."

"Well, that might be but you fucked that up when you treated Liam like you have been," Carson snouts out with disgust at the woman who raised us.

"I can't speak for my brothers but until you get over your issues with Liam, I'm not going to have anything to do with you either," Steven states firmly.

"Same goes for me," Carson and I both firmly state together.

"Why me; I didn't do anything to Liam?" dad asks quietly and brokenly.

"That's exactly the point, dad; we get that you and mom are hurting over Luke's death but so is Liam; you didn't stop mom from degrading him," I inform him.

Dad drops his head in the realization that I'm right about him and Liam as he whispers; "You're right and I need to fix this in order to see my grandson's and Liam."

"I'm not apologizing to that thing," mom seethes crossing her arms over her chest in defiance.

Shrugging at her while saying; "That's your decision but then it's your decision to not be able to see Ty and Tris grow up."

"Where are Liam and the boys now?" dad asks sadly.

"With a friend and they're safe," is all I tell him; not wanting to give mom anything to try and say against Liam.

"Probably being the slut he is," she snorts; while rolling her eyes.

"Stop it, Sonya!" dad shouts standing up; breathing heavily as they stare at each other.

"Why should I; he's nothing more than a damn slut!" she hollers back. "First he traps Luke in a relationship by adopting that toddler and then he became pregnant and Luke dies! Then he becomes close with the boys but Vance more-so and now he's moved onto another unknowing man!"

Slap! My brothers and I are shocked yet I'm secretly happy that dad just slapped mom across the face; not that physical violence is acceptable but in this instance, it is needed.

Mom doesn't react to this other than her jaw slacking at dad, she manages to stammer out; "Fuck you, Victor! We're done if you're picking that whore over me!"

"Then we're done, Sonya; I'm not losing my grandchildren or Liam because you're a bitter, hateful woman!"

"Get out of my house; NOW!" I say as calmly as I can, despite not feeling calm. "You're the reason all of us moved away and I should have never allowed Liam and the boys to move near you."

She stares for a moment at me before gathering her stuff to leave my home in an Uber.