Kabanata 0002

Chapter 3: Freefall 

I was flying. 

The sensation was just inexplicable. I was above the clouds, diving right through them. On one side shone the clear blue sky and on the other was land, amazing land. I could see buildings from afar, the endless brown plains, hectares and hectares of them in a green-brown pattern. The wind was howling, lashing at every inch of my bare body, cold biting, but most important of all, 

I was free. 

Completely, totally, blatantly free. It was blissful. 

Nothing could stop me. Not even Aiden who was screaming and screaming while laughing and crying- nobody could stop me. I had my eyes wide open, arms and legs spread out, my back curved at a perfect angle. The wind was so harsh that at times my breath just cut off but I didn't care. 

My head was literally in the clouds. 

The intense adrenaline, the rush and the experience were absolutely breathtaking. I arched my back, concentrated and for the first time succeeded the somersault in air. Feeling ecstatic, I screamed along with Aiden while free falling. This was what I wanted to do all my life: free fall from a plane, fly and feel it forever. 

Suddenly, Aiden's parachute launched and I smile. He'd definitely reach the ground safely with the way he handled that fall. I waited for mine to open, too. 

5 seconds, 7 seconds...Nothing happened. 

It had already happened before so I didn't panic, I was going to open it manually. I extended my arm backwards and tugged on the pull-out knob. Coach did say that we could launch it ourselves if it took too much time. Nothing to worry about. 

2 more seconds, I kept falling. 

In that sacred, blissful moment, another feeling crept in- something I had never felt during a fall. Fear. The chute should have opened the moment I had pulled on the knob so why didn't it happen?

If the parachute doesn't work, do not panic. Rely on the second parachute. That was what Coach said during the first sessions. In a split moment, I also realised that the second parachute was in my bag- Aiden's current bag- and panic seized me. Ground was approaching frightfully fast and the altimeter read 4500 feet. I had about 25 seconds before reaching the ground. 

I was plummeting at about 120 mph to my death. This couldn't be happening. There was a 0.0007% chance of dying in a skydive -next to nil - so what the hell was happening to me right now? 

I didn't know what to do anymore. 

I flailed around madly, trying to remove the bag from my shoulder to remove the parachute forcefully but the strong winds whipped me upside down, back to the ground. I screamed, trying to turn sideways quickly as the altimeter beeped 3000 feet left. Aiden was shouting something above me but I couldn't hear, I couldn't breathe. I was falling so fast that I thought my arm would rip off at any second. This can't be happening to me. 

"Oh my god," I gasped, "Oh my god."

I could already see myself, hitting the ground and smashing my bones to pieces. Mom would never be able to get over it- she only had me. Dad left us to get married to a woman somewhere in Texas so we never heard of him again and my grandparents had already passed away. Mom only had me left, so I couldn't just die. 

Dread and terror filled me, tears welled up and I reached out to my back, removed one strap, then another. I can do this. Screaming and gasping, I willed myself to flip over. God, FLIP. And I flipped. 

2000 feet. 

Palms sweaty, I grasped the bag, desperately tore it open and pulled onto the knob harshly one last time. One last time. 

Please. 

The ground was zooming in on me and I shut tight my eyes. Pshhh. I heard the most relieving sound ever: that of the parachute. I felt myself being propelled backwards for a mere second and then it happened. 

Excruciating pain zapped through my legs, shooting through me like a thousand bullets and so horrid that I could only see flashes of blind light.

The parachute had shot open at the last few feet but because of the speed my body had picked up, it hadn't slowed me down much. 

Eyes rolled back, mouth opened for an ear-splitting scream and my head fell forwards. 

I fell unconscious on impact with only one thought:

I never got the chance to tell you, mom, 'I love you.'