chapter 5

Emily. 

It's been exactly twelve minutes of silence with non of us speaking. We both sit across each other in the small cafe across my apartment.

Alex offered to help Archer pack some of his clothes for the upcoming week that we'll be spending away from home and he also offered to inform Jasmine about everything and that I am grateful for because Jasmine's questioning can be held off for a little while.

A little while meaning until I get back from my parents place the following week. I'm praying that by then she completely forgets about everything, but unfortunately I know that's not going to happen.

"Connor," I start by getting his attention away from the busy streets outside the cafe and onto me. "What happened?" I ask. 

I watch as he stares at me for a long minute before taking in a deep breath and rubbing his hand against his right eye that's closed.

Since I had been friends with Connor for years before moving away, I know exactly what that action means and I know it's been a few years since I've seen him, but I know that action all too well especially when it comes to him.

It's a sign that tells me exactly what I've been thinking, he is stressed and tired.

It's only then that I take in his form, the bags underneath his eyes and his tired red eyes, along with his scruff along his jawline, almost looking like his haven't been shaving for few weeks now.

He does look different now than back then when I knew him and that's because back then when I used to look at Connor I used to see a grinning goofy, playful eighteen year old, but now as he sits across of me with his head in his hands with sagging shoulders, all I see is a tired, broken man that I once called my bestfriend.

My heart tugs at the sight and my mother's words quickly ring into my mind, reminding me of what I had left behind.

And right now one of the things that I left behind is right here, sitting in front of me looking broken and hurt. I wasn't there for him when he needed me.

Eliza maybe have been right. I was selfish. I am selfish.

I should have never left. I should have stayed and stuck up to my problems, facing them head on, but I chose to run away from them, just like I always do.

The girl who is always running away from her stupid problems and not thinking about everybody else around her, the people that it would effect, she only thought about her damn self.

How fucking selfish and pathetic of her to think her disappearance would go unnoticed.

Her friends needed her and all she could do was run away like a scared little girl just because she had a problem that she couldn't face and now her friends are hurting and she wasn't there to help.

"I'm sorry that I'm so selfish." I whisper.

My voice so quite and shaky, but I know he heard me by the way he jerks his head up to look at me with curious eyes, waiting for me to go on.

I look away, forcing my tears back. I don't deserve to cry, I deserve to hurt. I shake my head, and look back at him, I give him a weak smile.

"I shouldn't have left like that, I didn't-I should have said something before. . . before disappearing." I stare at him for a moment before continuing. "I am sorry. I really am."

His tired eyes change into rage and anger way too quickly. He slams his hand onto the table between us. "No you're fucking not! You're not sorry. If you were, you would have tried contacting us, contacting me!" He snaps.

I duck my head, breaking eye contact and looking down at my hands because his right. He is and because I know that people are staring at us with shocked or interested faces.

"You're right, you shouldn't have left but you did and then we were left to pick up your pieces because you were too much of a goody two shoes to fucking do it!" He hisses.

I look back up at him. "I never wanted that

I just. . . I needed to leave. I couldn't stay. You don't know-" He cuts me off.

"I don't know what? What is it that nobody knows that made you leave your fucking family and friends because of one fucking asshole." He whisper yells at me.

I know he quited down because he senses the stares on us, but I still sense the hate and anger in his voice.

"It wasn't because of him!" I snap. "It was because of all of you, and him and my family!" I swat away the escaped tears.

He looks taken back at what I said and slumps back down into his chair, looking at me with confusion and hurt. I don't blame him for that look. "What do you mean?" He askes after a moment of silence.

I don't answer, I bite my cheek to hold back my tears and look away, shaking my head. "Are you going to tell me what happened?" I question.

He doesn't respond right away but I feel his stare on the side of my face. It's like his trying to search for answers that he won't get any time soon, especially from me.

He let's out a sigh after minutes of finally giving up when he knows I'm not going to answer his question. "Her parents." He mutters.

I meet his tired gaze once again. I want to question him more, but I know that he just let out some steam so I'll give him time to cool off while I joke about what he just said. 

"Martha and Jeffery, never did like you hey?" I bite my lip to stop the laugh that wants to escape.

A mischievous glint passes through his blue eyes. "Can you blame them? I'd be mad too if I found my teenage daughter naked under someone like me while screaming-"

I cut him off with a loud squeak which causes him to burst out in laughter. "That's too much information." I shake my head.

After he calms down, he gives me a playful look. "How are you still so innocent?" He murmurs, almost like his asking himself.

A giggle escapes me as I shrug my shoulders. We both stay silent for the next few minutes. It's like we're both readying ourselves for the bomb blast that's about to be thrown in front of us both.

"They made her believe that I was cheating," He pauses, taking in a deep breath, but he doesn't realize his words hit me.

Cheating. 

Cheating. 

Cheating. 

The horrid words ring inside of my mind as a flood of memories start to pile in one after another like a tidal wave hitting me continuously. It makes me want to throw up.

I force myself to stop playing through the memories of the past because this is not about me. It's about my two best friends right now and they need help.

"I was drunk one night and I don't know what the fuck happened." He mutters. "But I woke up in somebody else's bed with Indie standing by the door." He shakes his head.

That scene sounds so familiar and so fresh. 

"Fuck! Her face looked so broken. I tried to explain but she wouldn't listen. She told me to leave, to get out of her life and then the next week I find out she's engaged to someone her parents arranged for. That broke me even more, she didn't-" He cuts off, sniffing away tears.

My heart aches for him, his so hurt and broken yet so strong. He doesn't even know it, but he is. He shouldn't be going through this because he doesn't deserve this.

Connor is the most kind hearted and genuine person that I know, knew. He was always so playful and goofy, but he was smart, still is.

"She didn't fight for me like how I fought for her." His voice cracks. "I just don't know what to do." he adds. 

Nodding my head, I ask the question that entered my mind. "Why are you looking for a wedding planner?" I ask. 

He gives me a look, it's a tiring, exhausted and pleading look. My heart hurts for him all over again. He let's out a heavy sigh, and runs his hands through his wavy blonde hair and then down his face before speaking again.

"I wanted to be involved in the wedding, just to speak to her once but whatever I tried so far has just failed so when I heard that they were looking for a wedding planner, an experienced and famous one by the name of Emily Collins, I jumped on a plane." He explains. 

"What I didn't expect to see though was you, you're Emily Collins. The wedding planner that they want but can't get an appointment for because she's always fully booked." Connor chuckles shaking his head. 

"I always knew that you'll make it big though, you're amazing." He compliments and smiles. 

Happiness takes over my sadness for a moment causing me to beam at him. "Thank you, that means a lot." 

He nods his head and takes a break to sip his cold coffee before he continues to tell me why his here. He puts the cup down and looks around the small cafe before his blue eyes meet mine again. 

"I knew Jasmine because she used to date one of my cousins from her town, the town over to ours, we became friends. She's a great person." He says. 

I let out a laugh, but still, I nod my head in agreement. "A few screws loose but great nonetheless." I joke. 

We both stare at each other for a second before bursting out in laughter at my very true joke because Jasmine is a little crazy, maybe not a little, a lot. 

A few seconds after we sober up from our laugher, a content sigh leaves my lips as I stare at my old bestfriend. 

I place my elbow on the table and place my chin on my hand while staring at him. It's almost like a dream because never in a million years would I have thought that after years of not seeing him, that him and I would be in a cafe, drinking coffee and laughing about our friend. 

In all honesty, I never thought that I would see any of my old friends. It hurt that I thought that but I knew it was true until I was met with an angry Connor.

I am thankful though. That I saw him again because as we sit here, I remember how much I missed my friends over the years. What would have been the point then? Running away from everything and everyone that hurt me, only to be missing the very exact things I'd run away from. 

I shake away my heavy thoughts when Connor clears his throat to speak again. My eyes focus on his and what his says.

"Anyways. I asked her if she knew you and you can only imagine how thrilled I was to find out that she was working for you, well Emily Collins." He sends me a smile.

"And now we're here." He exclaims as he lifts his arms up to gesture around us. 

I smile back at him, nodding my head. "And now we're here." I mumble. 

We both silently decide to not say anything while we quickly finish our drinks and sit in silence again for the next six or so minutes until I decide it's enough because both of us have silent tears running down our faces. 

"I'm going to help you." I inform him, breaking the silence. 

His glassy eyes snap up to meet my glassy eyes and I send him a reassuring smile. My hand reaches over the table to his, I grab his tense hand and squeeze it.

I promise to help these two, even if my own life is about to get messed up because of it, I can't let them down. I've done that already and it hurt everyone, I'm going to try to fix it now in the best way I know how. 

I'm going to plan a wedding. 

A wedding not with Indie and whoever her loser parents set up for her, but a wedding for her and her true love, Connor. 

"Thank you." He smiles.

My eyes narrow at him, "You know how I feel about those." I playfully glare at him. 

He playfully rolls his eyes and let's out a groan. "Just take my thank you and shut up, you can lecture me another time." He says. "Plus, I didn't know if you changed that too." He adds straight after. 

"Nothing has changed Connor. I'm still the same." I roll my eyes. 

"You did change." He gives me a sad smile. 

I smile back, giving his hand another squeeze. He chuckles when I laugh and blink away the tears that want to fall again. I can't believe that I'm actually going through with this, but it's for the best, for my bestfriends.

"Connor, I'm here now."