chapter 10

"No." matigas kong tugon. 

I glanced back at them. Nakatalikod sila sa amin pero magkahawak pa din ang kamay habang pumipili ng damit. 

Wow. What a view.

I didn't get a chance to glimpse at the girl. All I know was we had the same hairstyle. But she's petite. Tapos medyo maliit. Compared to me, I think mas matangkad ako sa kaniya... at mas maganda.

I sighed and wiped my tears in the corner of my eyes. I glanced at him with a smile.

"Part 'yan ng relasyon," I shrugged before I picked up the shirt. LOL. Cheating was never been a part of relationship. Kung hindi ka masaya, iwan mo na!

I acted like it wasn't a big deal to me. I just don't want to think that I'm weak. 

Hindi ako nagpatinag sa malalim niyang titig. 

"Eto bagay sa'yo." Tinapat ko ang white sweater dito. His gaze didn't leave me. "Saka ito, oh." I picked up the denim shirt. "Ito pa!" also the green polo shirt. "Hala bagay sa'yo 'to!" It was a plain white shirt na may tatak na bench sa gitna. Hindi ko alam bakit pati iyon ay sinabi kong bagay sa kaniya. 

It was Flynne's fault.

Until I pay for everything. Hindi pa din siya umiimik at nakatingin lang sa akin. 

Kasalanan 'to ni Flynne 'e.

I was about to grab the paper bag nang unahan na niya ako. 

"Ako na."

I didn't response. I just shrugged. Nauna na akong maglakad.

And the whole time na tinuturo ko sa kaniya ang mga nadadaanan namin, hindi na talaga siya umimik. 

Titingin lang siya sa akin tapos tatango lang. 

I also notice that he's slowly becoming the center of attraction. Each people we've passed by, automatic na humahaba ang leeg nila para masilayang mabuti ang kapatid ko. 

I rolled my eyes. 

Katulad ng sinabi ni mommy, bumili kami ng phone niya. Actually, ako ang pumili. Ayaw naman niyang sabihin ang gusto niya. Puro tango lang siya.

So we settled to Iphone 6s. Umismid ako dahil ngiti lang ang reaction niya. Dati nga, halos pasalamatan ko na ang buong staff nang bilhan ako ni Daddy ng Phone. Tapos siya? Ngiti lang?! 

Sa bagay. He's a promdi. Para sa kaniya, mababaw lang ang ganitong kasiyahan.

"Do you want to go to Tom's World?" I asked after I sipped to my favorite frappe.

Sumulyap siya sa akin bago sumipsip sa milk tea nito. It's his first time pero sanay na agad siya sa lasa. He didn't react when he taste it, 'e.

"Uhm, parang amusement park iyon sa loob ng mall. Gusto mong pumun—"

"Hindi. Alam kong pagod ka na."

"Hindi ah! May energy pa ako! Kaya nga niyayaya ki—"

"Pagod ka ng magpanggap."

My lips parted. I lightly hit his shoulder. "W-what are you saying?" I chuckled. 

He looked away. "Magpanggap na ayos ka lang." napatigil ako. He stopped too. "Sa likod ng ngiti mo ay ang sakit na pilit mong itinatago. Hindi naman masama na magpanggap na masaya pero kung may pagkakataon kang ilabas lahat ng nararamdaman mo, bakit hindi mo gawin?" He glanced back at me. 

He was always in a serious mode but this time I found it different. It was like every word he said has a sense. I felt like I wanted it to do it right now. 

Tears suddenly welled up on my face. 

"Uuwi na tayo?" I pouted.

He nodded.

—

Pag-uwi namin ay saktong tumawag si mommy na nasa birthday sila ng friend ni daddy. Around 8 pm pa daw sila makakauwi. They already prepared our food for dinner.

Perfect timing to burst out what I'm feeling. 

Hindi ako tumuloy sa kwarto ko. I stopped in front of my room. My tears suddenly raced down on my face. I cried just as I seated on the floor.

First boyfriend. First heartbreak. Ganito pala kasakit. For almost 6 years na kilala ko siya and 1 year of relationship, I never thought he'd cheat on me. 

KItang-kita ng dalawa kong mata kung paano siya ngumiti habang magkahawak ang kamay nila ng babae niya. He's... happy. The worse thing... was he never showed me that kind of smile when he's with me.

Umangat ako ng tingin nang maramdaman ang presensiya ni kuya sa harap ko. 

I bit my lower lip when I saw how he looked at me. 

Nag-aalala ang mga mata niya. 

Tears were continue to fall down as he bent in front of me to take a look on my face clearly. 

I didn't surprise when he pulled me to embrace me. I just found myself hugging him tighter while crying.

Kinabukasan. 

I woke up with fluffy eyes. I remembered I wasn't able to eat dinner because I told my brother that I wanted to sleep already. Then he walked with me inside my room and he promised that he'll not tell anything to my parents about what happened yesterday. 

"Nasaan sila?" bungad ko sa kaniya nang madatnan siyang mag-isa sa kusina. He's busy preparing for our breakfast. 

He's wearing white shirt and sweat pants. Nakababa na din ang buhok niya. All I really can say is that he looks good on it. He looked at me and greeted me. Then he smiled. 

I greeted him back before I looked away just to look for my parents. 

"May pinuntahan. Babalik din daw bago mag-tanghalian." He answered. "Kumain ka na."

Tumingin ako sa kaniya at umupo sa harap niya.

Hindi ko inalis ang tingin dito. I scanned his face. I remembered the scar I saw last time. Visible lang pala kapag malapit mo siyang tinititigan. But why he had that kind of scar? Geez.

At bakit ang lakas ng appeal niya ngayon?

He's wearing pambahay but it's screaming... perfection. Everything on his face were perfectly built. From thick eye lashes and gorgeous brown eyes to kissable natural red lips. 

Bakit siya may ganoon? Ako wala?

"Okay ka na ba?" 

I immediately gaze at my food. Ang tagal ko yatang nakatitig. I didn't notice that he already put rice and bacon on it. 

"Did you know that my motto is 'cry but don't die'?" Sumubo ako bago tumingin sa kaniya. Diretso lang din ang tingin nito sa akin habang ngumunguya. "Iiyak lang ako. Pero hindi ko papatayin ang sarili ko sa sakit. I'll not overthink that pain. I could do so many things para pasiyahin ang sarili ko. Hindi ako katulad ng iba, magmumukmok, tapos magwawalwal, after. So cheap." I rolled my eyes, continue to eat my food. 

"Okay." He simply answered before he went back eating. "Oo o hindi lang naman ang sagot." I heard him muttered as he shrugged. 

Bigla tuloy akong natawa. So he had that kind of attitude? I didn't know!

-

"Cute ko 'no?" I pointed the picture of me as a kid who's smiling widely under the tree. I think I was 5 years old there.

"Okay lang," he responded again, flipping into another page.

We are busy looking our photo albums. Ako ang taga kwento about sa story ng bawat picture tapos siya taga-flip. He had a picture on it though hindi naman kami magkasamang lumaki, pinapadala ng tatay niya ang mga litrato niya kay mommy.

I turned off my phone today because I decided that I'll spend my day with my brother. Now, we're on the sala. We both sitting on the floor. 

I rolled my eyes for the 3rd time. Sa t'wing pinupuri ko ang sarili ko, iyan ang palagi niyang sagot. 

"Sa Disneyland!" Turo ko sa bumungad na picture. Buhat ako ni Dad. Nasa tabi niya si mommy habang katabi nito si Mickey Mouse! Halata ang struggle ko sa pag-form ng peace sign! "Ang cute ko talaga!" mahina kong pinalo ang braso niya. 

"Okay lan—"

"Puro ka 'Okay lang'! Aki na nga!" Agaw ko sa kaniya ng album saka siya sinamaan ng tingin. 

He didn't response. 

I flipped through the pages to look for his picture as a kid. Puro kasi baby pic niya ang nakikita ko. Hindi ko maasar kasi masyado siyang cute!

I smirked when I found one at the end. 

"Look! Pfft! Iyakin!" I pointed the picture of him crying while there's a carabao beside him. Medyo malabo dahil may kalumaan na pero alam kong siya 'yun. "Takot ka sa kalabaw?" I teased. He leaned closer to see it clearly.

"Hindi ko na 'yan matandaan." mas lalo niyang tinignan ito. 

"Kawawa!" pang-aasar ko sa kaniya. Bakit ako? I still remembered everything back then. "Mag-memory plus gold ka na!" 

Tawa ako nang tawag habang pinagmamasdan niya pa din ang picture niya. 

Napatigil lang ako nang makita ang isang picture na nasa ilalim ng mesa. Mukhang nahulog. 

I picked it up and it was a picture of my brother?

My brows furrowed as I scanned it. Napa-ayos ako ng upo. 

He's standing here while holding his teddy bear toy, pouting. Naka-side view siya at bunot ang buhok niya. Mas malinaw ang picture na ito kumpara sa nauna. 

I glanced at him, naka-side view din siya. I glanced back at the picture. My brows furrowed even more. 

I don't know but suddenly, I found it... odd.